Theater Hell aka the Student Matinees

The student matinee.

Correction.

The. Dreaded. Student. Matinee.

The Lord is my shepherd I shall not .... There are so many things surrounding a student matinee that go against protocol or standard practices that it's now wonder that so many fear it. Who the hell wants to wake up early in the morning, after an exhausting two-show day that ended just short of midnight for the uncharted waters of the ... 5-18 demographic?! You know, the same demographic that makes folks not want to become a substitute teacher? Not all of us are born with Sister Mary Clarence gumption... or want to have to tap into that "check-a-kid-that-should-have-had-corporal-punishment" strength.

Unlike the geriatric early bird performance (big-ups to AARP), or the rambunctious Friday evening post-work-week crowd aka one shot/two shots/ three shots/ a dollar, or even the appreciative family midday Saturday audience - an early morning student performance is. the. realest.

Bus line wraps around the theater as. It's gonna be an epic performance.

Ask any actor if they're excited for their student matinee and you'll see their eyes glaze over  with apprehension as they mentally go through the following questions:

• Will they cooperate? 
• Will they understand it? 
• Will they talk back? 
• Will they fall asleep? 
• Will they use their phones? 

Even though the same questions exist for a "regular audience" (let's be honest, they can be mad disrespectful as well), there's something about this younger demographic that gives people ulcers.

How do I feel about student matinees?  I. Love. Them.

In my experience, most are experiencing live theater for the first time. For them it's still an exciting novelty. Seeing them react to the show and spit responses to the ensemble is thrilling. They're... still innocent. Receptive and Responsive. Honest and Untamed. They don't yet feel the social pressures of donors and benefactors. Feeling them embrace to the enormity of an epic show in an epic space is humbling. I'm always reminded of my own feelings of awe. Whether it's during the first table-read, aka, the first day of school, or during the tech rehearsals that transform a barren space into a bustling new worlds (both "on-stage" and "off-stage), or even experiencing the lights dim before a show begins, that feeling *never* goes away.

It's magic. It's fascinating. It's everything.

And hearing my young audiences respond to the show, sometimes with the most... worldly of vocabularies (note the euphemism) is eye-opening and inspiring. Student matinees remind me of the birth of my passion for theater and live performance. That's where my desire to be a storyteller came to be. Seeing students have their first taste of what I had excites and rejuvenates me.

Yes, we've got our fair share of nappers -- can you blame them, it's dark and cold in there. And yes, we've got whisperers and live reactions. But dammit, I like performing for the little rascals. They live. THEY MUTHAF*CKIN LIVE. What more would you ask for?

So I promise, never to be afraid, of the matinee. Why? It's gon' be lit.

PS. Hearing a bunch of teenagers lose it over a kiss, or the lights going down is hilarious. I forget that those things were once unchartered territory for as well.

Auditioning: The Shit That Don't Quit

Lessssbehonesssst, auditioning scary. The only times I enjoy auditioning are...

1. When I literally give no f****. 
2. When I KNOW that I am soooo wrong for the part (all male, or all white, or all tappers, or all whatever I am not and the likelihood of them casting me in say... Funny Girl is slim to none... and therefore I (literally and figuratively, all-up-and-in-that audition room give not a one).

I mean, I understand the necessity of auditioning. How else is the world supposed to see my work, especially in a new market. In all the ways I feel confident about what I can do, there are just as many ways that I can still learn. And with time, the logic goes that I'll ripen. That being said, it floors me that veteran actors have to audition. Correction: when I see a line of veteran, super-talented actors, standing in line to audition. A line... that I am also in. When did that happen?

The Rep has fantastic facilities and I get to use them for a year. (Thanks guys!) The Rep also allows local theater companies to hold their auditions in the building's rehearsal halls. On one particular evening, due to the schedule, my cohort and I were given time slots early in the day to audition for an upcoming theater festival in the area this summer. Afterwards, we all headed to a slew of rehearsals.  When we had our next ten-minute break, BOOM. Big ass line of actors...in the same line. When did that happen!?

This is NOT The Rep. I stole it from the Internet to be dramatic. Because that's what I do as an actor. I do things dramatically for an effect. I also do this in real life. And sometimes I make myself laugh. Right now I am laughing hysterically because I think I'm being clever. (The definition of Actor is not "be dramatic.") End. Scene.

I don't get excited about auditioning because I know that there are massive amounts of skill and talent that already exist in my industry. Add to that the reality that sometimes my youth, or skill, or look simply does not comply with what a director envisions. But to see that actors older and more esteemed than myself are officially in competition with me, or I with them, is odd. It's a part of the job.

And I believe that this is why I strive to create, and write, and produce, things. I am drawn to the idea that I can make something tangible for myself and for others. I don't have to clamor, I can have it. . There are so many stories that haven't been told,  I know my hasn't. So when it comes to auditioning, I like being reminded, that's it's time to create again.

Part II: What You Didn't Know About Tony and Olivier Award-Winning Choreographer Stephen Mear

Continued...

Were you ever teased about being dyslexic?
When I was young they didn't know what it was I suppose. I was told I was thick by a math teacher. And he said to me, which was a good thing actually, "there is no good doing any of these amateur operatics, you're never gonna be in show business. You need to face the real world."

So what snapped for you then to say fuck you?
It was a real thing of me determining to do it. Like I said, It's a way of expressing myself. I can express myself through dance. And tell a story through dance and it's something I love doing. Whereas I find it hard to write. I mean writing for first night cards for this has literally pushed me over the edge. Always does.

Stephen's meticulous gaze in "Till We Reach That Day"

I know you talk about being extremely fortunate and lucky in your own career. But have you ever had to deal with hardships of finances, or food, or places to sleep?
Yes. When I did my first 3 West End Shows. I did 2 when I was still at college. I was very lucky the college let you do that so I only had to miss the afternoon of one day. But, stupidly being young and thinking I'd made it, I did these three West End shows and I didn't save my tax! Didn't save any tax. So then I was banged with a massive tax bill. I was living on planet Zarg I think. And my family weren't very well off  at all, I couldn't turn to them. But I had this big bill and I had to pay it over the next three years of my career. It was my own fault and it as a way of learning. And I did pay it all off. I literally had to scrimp and save for two years on the jobs I was doing. Luckily I was on tour with some fabulous friends. And we all took care of each other and I was looked after in that way. But I paid it all off. And I remember my mom being so upset when I told her years later about it. They couldn't have done anything, there's nothing they could have done and I couldn't do that. Even though they've never had a lot of money, I've never been without, I always went to dance class. So that's why when I first did big job and got lots of money, I bought my mum and dad a house near me in Brighton, a bungalow. That's the first thing I wanted to do. I did it.

Are you a momma's boy?
Yeah, a little bit. There's three [of us]. A lesbian, a gay, and a straight girl. My mum always says I've got one of each.

What do you think of dance reality TV shows?
You know what, I've been in one. I did So You Can Dance [in the UK], I did the first series. As a choreographer. Nigel [Lythgoe], I've known him for years, asked me to be a judge originally. And said I'd rather be a choreographer so I could show what I can do. And also when you're are a judge you've got people booing if they don't agree with you. I did four numbers or five. I did the very first number in the show. I was the Broadway choreographer and I was offered the next series and I couldn't do it because I was doing a show. That, I loved because all the dancers that ended up in the end weren't just dancers off the street, they are trained. I love the American one, I think the American one is fabulous. I'm not so mad on all the reality shows that make people stars that aren't stars.

Cup of tea or a drink?
A Drink.

Boxers or Briefs?
Briefs

Where will you go on your next anniversary?
The best anniversary was last year. Me and my partner and my best friend went out for dinner with Liza Minnelli. Because my best friend is her best friend. [Liza] had come over over to watch my production of "She Loves Me" in Chichester, all the way to Chichester and I've become friends with her only through my friend. So on our anniversary, after she'd done her one-woman show in England, she took us out for dinner afterwards. But next year, I'd like to be abroad with my partner.

Biggest piece of advice?
Always show yourself to the best ability you can when you are working with people.

Biggest piece of shit you've ever heard?
Let's think. So many people talk rubbish. Just work hard. You never know who people are gonna meet. It's a small business, however much we think it's big, it's small and it gets around if somebody's a pain in the ass 'cause  I won't work with people who are pains in the ass, not in London 'cause I know who they are. People ring me for their shows and ask me what people are like. Keep your nose clean and just do a great job.

What You Didn't Know about Tony and Olivier Award-Winning Choreographer Stephen Mear

I had the pleasure to sit down and chat with Stephen Mear, the brilliant choreographer of Milwaukee Repertory Theater's current production of Ragtime and boy did we have a great time! He squeezed in some time to meet with me post rehearsal, both of us exhausted, to have a real conversation about art, life, and the pursuit of happiness. As you read, imagine us both laughing hysterically... or rather me... laughing (unattractively) in hysterics. Both in and out of the rehearsal hall, He has taught me so much about performance, work ethic, movement, storytelling, and being a great human being. Little did I know that this wonderful spirit is also a two-time Olivier and one-time Tony award winning choreographer. If you get the chance to work with him, hell talk to him, you are definitely in good hands.

-----

Stephen, what's up? Thanks so much for letting me do this. Well the first thing I wanted to know is, what drew you to dance in the first place?
When I was 3, my mum was a dance teacher at a school. She just used to help out. And so I used to run in and out of the class. And I just joined that way. She never wanted me to. I just chose to do it.

Did you just keep taking classes?
Yeah, and also I'm dyslexic. It was a way I could express myself through dance. So that's why I kind of pursued it more.

You told me that sometimes it goes back and forth with how often travel between the UK and the US. What's your preference?
I like both. I think I'm very lucky, I think I'm so lucky. Oh my God. Most of my work the last few years has been in the UK.

What do you think the difference is between English performers and American performers?
I think [England] has the same amount of talent. They used to say that English people didn't have the talent as much as Americans. I mean [England] fits into Texas three times, so the talent [England] has got is snapped up straight away. Whereas in America there is so much more talent. That's what it is. And I think in England because they are paid such crap money, I think they must love it if they do it there. Everybody I know who's in the West End teaches or does another job

How comes you guys don't have Equity there or a union?
We do, but you don't have to be a part of it. Wish is such a shame because if you were it would be stronger. So people can come in off the street and audition and have no training, nothing. Normally it doesn't work for them like it does for people who are trained.

What's it like to be in Milwaukee? 
Fabulous!

Did you think it was random?
It's not because, I work at a rep theater in England called Chichester Festival Theatre and it's very similar to that which is outside of London. It's kind of the same feel. It's a massive city with no cars on the road. They have these wide roads and hardly any traffic.

Stephen Mear (R) teaching a sequence for Tateh & Little Girl in "Ragtime"

So you're going to New York after this?
Yeah, to audition dancers for the Met, the Metropolitan Opera for a few days. I'll be back over there for Christmas and New Year.

What would you encourage a young dancer to do? Why do it? Is it even worth it?
If you are a dancer I would encourage you to do it if you wanted to do it. I deal with musical theater people so I prefer triple threats that can act, sing and dance.

How is it working in the show dealing with different skill levels and body types?
I'm so used to it because I've done a lot of musicals where we've had to just have actors. It's just giving them confidence to believe in you and trust you. Like I always say to everybody, I will never make anybody look stupid. I really believe it. But also, I think once you say that to somebody, people will open up to you, even if they make a fool of themselves in rehearsal, they are willing to do that to see how far they can be pushed.

What's your biggest pet peeve about performers or dancers?
When people say no. If someone says "no, I can't do that" "or no I wouldn't" and they start getting defensive, that's when you know you're in trouble and I'm not good with people like that.

I am a little curious, not to backtrack too much, but you mentioned you were dyslexic. Have you ever made any pieces about being dyslexia?
No I haven't actually. And when I decided to do "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" in Mary Poppins [on the West End], Matthew Bourne said to me "are you mad?" Because I couldn't spell it. We had to have all the letters on the mirror while I was doing it!

Were you ever teased about being dyslexic?
.......
More on this and the struggles of being a performer in Part II of our conversation here.

The Token Dancer from the Ghetto Story...

It's at the core of American identity and yet, so often, our country is afraid to face it: race. I know, if it were me, I'd hit the back button in a second, but bear with me. As a woman of color I deal with race all the time, I mean all the damn time. Add to that, I'm performing in Milwaukee Repertory Theater's current production of "Ragtime," analyzing race gets exhausting. But during a recent lunch break, I had the chance to watch an episode of my favorite shows called "Breaking Pointe" about the inner workings of a BalletWest, one of the nations premier ballet companies.

In this particular episode, the cast list for Cinderella is to be revealed. There is steep competition for one role in particular, Napoleon, for whom two dancers are in the running for. One, Zachary Prentice, is young, gossip-hungry dancer from the Ballet 2 Apprentice Company and the other is Joshua Whitehead, a young dancer from the ghetto who is in the primary company Corps. The first white, the latter black. (Must we always have a dancer from the ghetto story... I digress). The role requires someone with amazing comedic timing, characters skills, and ability to be the butt of everyone's jokes. It goes to the white guy. No biggie... EXCEPT... when there is.

Josh bravely approaches the Artistic Director, Adam Sklute, about the casting and asks "Is it because I'm black?" Adam reveals that he chose not to cast this young man because he cared very deeply for the dancer and didn't want to make a joke of the only African-American male in the entire company. Conversely, this young dancer wanted to be seen only for this talent, not his race (a rather naive standpoint, but perhaps I'm much more of a realist than I realize).  If an audience member read something into the performance, it was on them.

Center - Josh Whitehead

I felt a wealth of complex emotions for the both men. The Artistic Director wanted to respect this young dancer. But in doing so, he has limited this young man's chance to perform because of his race. In one moment, this dance company highlighted the subtlety of race and injustice in America but also the generational transformations that are occurring over time. The Artistic Director, by all accounts (and assumptions) is an open-minded and educated individual. He made a decision from a point of power based on race. The dancer lost an opportunity due to the fear of how his skin would add/change the story.

I was heartbroken and reminded again of the reality of my race. I am always the other with weighted meaning, and white is the litmus test of neutrality. As an actress, among other things, I found it a wonderful insight into race politics for America, but largely, race politics in the performance world. Hopefully, I will not always be relegated to roles that only a black person could play, but rather I will be given the opportunity to perform.

-EazeWaySays

Save Ya Rep: Working in Repertory Theater

Working in repertory theater for the Houston Shakespeare Festival was an eye-opening experience. We worked on two very different shows at the same time, Antony & Cleopatra and As You Like It switching back and forth each day spending the first week of rehearsal on AYLI and the second on A&C. On our last day of tech, which is a beast in of itself, one of our directors mentioned it had technically only been our 14th day rehearsing that show. WTF!!!! Are you serious.

These two shows could not have been more different. To be honest, on the days when I know I am to frolic in the land of Egypt... although I'm done up to the I was so nervous. "Antony & Cleopatra" is an absolute beast. It was fun yet hard. With each new performance, as usual, I got more comfortable. Never in my life have I shown that much skin for that many people. I think I did alright. Whatcha think?

Yours Truly working it as Charmian in 'Antony & Cleopatra'

As for As You Like It. Boy did I love playing Phebe. What a firecracker! If I'm honest, I wasn't always quite sure why people were laughing at what I was doing but I'm sure that a part of it was  because of how much my Silvius and I were in contrast to one another but also because neither of us relinquished our overall objectives. (Ick. Actor speak. My apologies ya'll). But, I'm thinking... maybe it's not my business to know why the audience laughs, but just trust what I do. The director and my scene partners are taking care of it. If I just commit to my goal and point of view, I'm golden.

Me as Phebe really wanting some Ganymede. Ha

What working in repertory theater setting really helps me work on was on how well one must rehearse, how to be efficient with time, and how to juggle two things at once. Having to continually balance two realities, and commit to telling an honest and committed story was arduous and rewarding. Even the more established actors would comment on how out of practice there were in the repertory setting. It was such a wonderful exercise in time management, multi-tasking, and so much more. I'll be heading off to Milwaukee Repertory Theater to do much of the same. It'll be exhausting to say the least, but hey, get to act for a living, God willing. I couldn't be luckier.

Ragtime @ Milwaukee Rep - First Weeks

This is a long time coming, but it was in my cue, so I thought I'd go ahead and hit update.

And from Houston Shakespeare Festival... I moved briskly to the Milwaukee Repertory Theater to continue my tenure as a professional actor. OMG?! WTF?! SERIOUSLY. Ok so... Officially, I am given the title 'Artistic Intern Company Member"... or something like that. Whatever. What it means is that I get to act...professionally...for a season. Which I've been reminded, by many of the professional actors working with whom I'm working, is an amazing opportunity. There are so many things I can discuss about my experiences thus far (and need to.. the good... the bad, but what I want to focus on are these amazing people and the rehearsal!

The first show of the season is 'Ragtime' and if you haven't seen it before, you are definitely missing out one of the best theatrical experiences of a lifetime. All of that corny-hokey-it-changed-my-life people talk about.. happens in this show.

I loved just getting into the rehearsal process. The artistic team behind this show is wonderfully gifted and generous. I've grown so much in just the ... 10 days (man does it actually feel like 3 weeks) since I've been here. From the brilliant choreographer, to the amazing dance captain, to the intelligent director to the... OMG. Yeah not enough time. 

I can just say that as an actor, I was thrilled moving into the rehearsal space and getting to sing, speak, and dance. And given this city's history, It's gonna be an amazing show. 

#eek

Joining A Biker Gang?: Motorcycles in Milwaukee

Milwaukee is apparently the city of festivals. There is always something going on; seriously, every week. I expect fireworks 1-3 times a week. It's kinda like heaven for a fireworks junkee like myself. My evening walks from 12 hour rehearsals welcome the spectacle. (Although I'm fairly certain that come winter time the fireworks and festivals will end and I'll just be sad about how cold it is. Wait, it snows here. This Texas girl will have snow! Wait... I don't think I have any appropriate winter attire... crap). Refocusing in 5 ... 4 ... 3...2...

Anyway, what makes Milwaukee's being the city of festivals super cool is that this past week, since Harley-Davidson was founded here, the brand held its 110th anniversary celebration here. Translation = The city was o'errun with biker gangs. The lawn in front of the building where I'm being housed was turned into a parking lot... and tailgating central. The lawn... the nice stuff they take pictures of for the brochure. LOL.  This is the view from outside my work. It does them no justice.

The entire city hosts thousands of bikers from all over the continent (I'm choosing to say continent because if you brought your bike from Hong Kong to Milwaukee I take issue with your mental state and how your prioritize). Milwaukee completely caters to the celebrants! Miraculously, new (free) parking spaces miraculously appear, drinking in public is given a side-eye by the authorities, streets even shutdown for.... wait for it... a biker parade.

The life of a biker must be kind of fun. The camaraderie, the delight that arrives from being a rebel, having wind blow through you hair. Personally, I thought it was pretty cool. I, however, definitely noticed that a number of my colleagues moods changed to a slightly more super-stank-than-normal-frankness and temperament due to the dramatically changed soundscape of the city. Hahaha. But, me I enjoyed it.

That is until I saw a bike with a confederate flag on it. Yea, Whomp. whomp. Next festival please.

Milwaukee Repertory Theater is Hearing the "Ragtime"

And from Houston Shakespeare Festival... I moved briskly to the Milwaukee Repertory Theater to continue my tenure as a professional actor. OMG?! WTF?! SERIOUSLY. What a quick change! That was for the theater heads out there. There are sooo many things I can discuss about my experiences thus far (and need to.. the good... the bad and the.. but what I want to focus on are these amazing people and the rehearsal!) I'm so excited to be here!

The first show of the season is 'Ragtime!' If you haven't seen it before, you are definitely missing out one of the best theatrical experiences of a lifetime. All of that corny-hokey-it-changed-my-life people talk about.. happens in this show. It's one of those your life ain't right until you seen it. Ok, moving on from #firstworldproblems if you are in town.. show up!

I LOVED just getting into the rehearsal process. The artistic team behind this show is wonderfully gifted and generous. I've grown so much in just the ... 10 days (man does it actually feel like 3 weeks) since I've been here. From the brilliant choreographer, to the amazing dance captain, to the intelligent director to the... OMG. Yeah, not enough time. 

I can just say that as an actor, I was thrilled to get into the nitty gritty of telling this story... and moving into the rehearsal space and getting to sing, speak, and dance. And given this city's history, It's gonna be an amazing show. 

#eek