excuses

My 2019 Vision Board: A Tale of Self-Sabotage. by *nickels*

Vision boards. I enjoy making them. It's a great way to exercise my imagination and picture a reality that I want for myself. And while it's definitely something a lot of people make at the beginning of the year, I wouldn't call it a required task. If anything, I think writing out your goals for the year and breaking the actions needed to turn those goals into facts is a better indicator of success for the coming year than vision boarding. Seriously, THAT PART.

Bu t's still fun to SEE the things you want. After having my year-in-review meeting with myself (I am a corporation) where I reviewed the failures and success of last year and then planned my goals for the next (breaking down the actions needed to achieve them into quarters), I was ready to craft!

And... I got stuck.

When I tell ya'll, I came up with every (stupid) excuse known to man to not make the vision board including:
  • I didn't have the right magazines to find pictures that matched my vision. 
  • I promised my sister I'd wait so we could do it together. 
  • I promised my sister I'd wait before cutting her magazines. 
  • I don't have the right poster board to put the pictures and quotes on. 
  • It's raining outside and I can't go out and get any. 
  • No one will buy me one.
  • It's too late in the day to start.

I even found some white 8.5X11 printer paper and was going to paste a few sheets together and then I thought "Oh no! If the paper is fragmented, my dream is fragmented. It won't work."



My sister finally caved and told me she had some colorful teacher/butcher coloring paper from school. It was slightly wrinkled but it was a single sheet, which is what I wanted. I put it on the wall to began assembly and all all of a sudden.... the single sheet of paper, that was colored, that I wanted was too too dark.

Self-sabotage is real.

Ya'll, I have already cut all the things I want to put on my board and I'm still waiting for it to be perfect before I start AND the dang thing is for my eyes only! What in the actual humanoid-self-sabotage-fuckery is this!? I have literally already written the goals, the steps to achieve them, I have cut the magazines and procured images and I'M OVER HERE OVERANALYZING OVER SOME PAPER.

This is how waiting for the perfect moment to fulfill your dreams/goals will have you fucking up your own blessings.



SO, I'm going to sit my ass down and paste this white paper together or maybe use these red butcher paper and I will COMPLETE THIS VISION BOARD. Then, I'm going to finish this blog and post it on the internet because I promised that I'd post a blog a week for the year.

Phew. Be better than me from 30 minutes ago stressing out over paper. (I'm still lowkey mad at myself).

This is my vision board. I ended up venturing out to get white posterboard because I wanted to see the negative white space. Go figure.
Self awareness is real. My vision board was a little late. But my vision board is done. Me: 1 My Ego: 0