Are Darren/Daniel Amusing?.... / by *nickels*

1.
(Satire Is approaching.) Go with it.
1. Guys. Negroes getting killed sucks. Well for some of us. But I’m gonna take a second to be politically correct and say what Obama… or someone in the White House is gonna say. “We are all fellow Americans. The endangerment of one of us should affect all of us”…. Omg I can’t even finish that sentence without choking from how NOT true it is. Anyway. INSIGHTS
2. I really think Michael Jackson had the right idea. Bleaching your skin and changing your nose and hair?! That might have been the smartest thing he ever did. As a child born in the late 80s/early 90s, I was first introduced to him as that light skined dude that made people faint, pee their pants and faint. You know.. pre-BEYONCE. It took me 20 years before I accessed ‘The Wiz” and realized he was born a completely different race… and you know.. alive.
3. If I had a grudge and a chip on my shoulder… and I was white.. I WOULD become a cop. Just like the ROTC folks that came to visit us during high school telling us the wonders of service and protecting (a certain) humanity… I would so sign up for the police force. Like for reals. Job security like a b****h. And if that didn’t work. And even if I got suspended with no pay… someone is gonna feel bad for me a start a gofundme. This works for a lot of people. Remember potato salad guy. #baller
Killing/Prosecuting/Arresting black people regularly as opposed to arresting them (check #crimeswhilewhite) is a really great way to get them to go back to Africa (the continent…not country… or the Caribbean). #winning
4. I forgot about all my allies from the ALS challenge and the equal marriage debates that happened on Facebook. You remember the videos we all posted and the Facebook profile photos we changed. I still got your back though…
5. Guys… we all need to calm down. It’s actually (gasp) a conspiracy. They don’t want us to be the Duggars. But we SHOULD be. My mother had 6 kids, yes with the same father and they were happily married. RIP dad. I think that means I’m super fertile! I can do it. Would i get a TV show? Or will I have to be super ignorant… sorry, I mean ignant, despite my IVY league degree to actually show a true depiction of black life in the country I was born?